Gratification. in terms of games is like getting a level 5 character and using it immediately to kill enemies. alot of times, because of the weak levels, the players get killed.
Delayed Gratification, in terms of games, is like getting a level 5 character and training with it till it becomes level 100 and kill bosses with it. Due to overpowering differences, The player normally wins..
Difference, patience... Patience Wins Battles...
Monday, December 29, 2008
Saturday, December 13, 2008
Monday, December 01, 2008
Feel the fear and do it anyway
I need to overcome this...
If you all don't know.. I actually have this fear of calling people...
Even friends... am still changing myself.. But this i need to overcome..
Its also this kind of fear in tradings.. i need to overcome them..
Gambatte!
If you all don't know.. I actually have this fear of calling people...
Even friends... am still changing myself.. But this i need to overcome..
Its also this kind of fear in tradings.. i need to overcome them..
Gambatte!
Tuesday, November 18, 2008
not meant to be.
I guess things were not meant to be.. Lost interest.... Not that i wanted to, but well.. like a fire, if you don't add oxygen to it... it will die off ...
Friday, November 14, 2008
Been Drinking 4Lts of water almost for 2 days now...
I want to grow in size... i realise that at the moment my size is too small...
I need to train.. Grow Bigger in size.
The thing i've always lack is drinking water.. and that is why i started this water regiment.
let me continue and grow bigger size.
I realized that a pent house is 1.25 Million USD which is about 1.8 million SGD now..... thats my dream house type. to reach this goal... I need to have enough income/money to pay for it, be it active income, passive income. 1.8 million = 360k in down... plus.. about 4-5 k in Bank fees every month. WOW.. tts going to be a long long way... Never mind... i'll work towards that goal.
Thinking of setting up an online blog shop too. Actually, I am thinking of setting up alot of things.. hahaha... So, I shall... think of what first before i commit anything. Business... I'll welcome them.
I want to grow in size... i realise that at the moment my size is too small...
I need to train.. Grow Bigger in size.
The thing i've always lack is drinking water.. and that is why i started this water regiment.
let me continue and grow bigger size.
I realized that a pent house is 1.25 Million USD which is about 1.8 million SGD now..... thats my dream house type. to reach this goal... I need to have enough income/money to pay for it, be it active income, passive income. 1.8 million = 360k in down... plus.. about 4-5 k in Bank fees every month. WOW.. tts going to be a long long way... Never mind... i'll work towards that goal.
Thinking of setting up an online blog shop too. Actually, I am thinking of setting up alot of things.. hahaha... So, I shall... think of what first before i commit anything. Business... I'll welcome them.
Tuesday, November 11, 2008
Wednesday, October 29, 2008
Friday, October 24, 2008
My Feelings
Warning, Super Long Post full of crap in my mind.
This doesn't seem to suit the previous post. so, i made a new thread.
My oldest memories that I ever have... was the one where I follow my father to see my sister's birth. It was in a hospital... I don't know which hospital, but I don't bother to check it also.
It was a quiet place and life was just ....Going pass so fast....
There was another one.. which comes first i don't know.... I was in a night market in amk with my mother. She was holding on to me... but I told her to let me down.. I was too fat for her to carry... and somewhere somehow... I got a dragonball imprint T-shirt at one of the stalls...
That was when i was 4, i assume. Other memories seems faded... A kiss with my cousin. My sister's big fall from the public seat , playing with my toys in the living room . competition and being jealous that i was the one who got first, but my teammates got 1st but i got 3rd... Hahah.. stupid story.. So embarrass, going to McDonald's for my friends party, mom bring me home for lion dance. going for art class. playing "soccer" with my cousin. role playing sukasuka ranger.
friend being hit on the head of the cabinet. Being in charge of the small library. reading Enid Blyton books , seeing my friends read Malorie towers, naughtiest girl series, The tree that grew... watch toy story 1 at the movie theatre. Crying at my birthday.... Shit man... I realise that my birthday is not a good day for me... every year at my birthday , I mange to cry or feel sad...
the first birthday i remember, crying cause i got bullied , Second one, I got hit by someone i don't know. 3rd, I thought that people celebrated for my cousin but not me ( we always hold birthday together cause we are born 1 day apart, different year though)( in the end, it was always on my birthday, not my cousin ) 4th , was P6, where i got my mom to treat a lot of people in my class at McDonald's. I was crying at 12 midnight to get it.. ( It was the PSLE science paper ) . then in secondary school, i remember only the one where my mom gave me money to eat McDonald's. But the catch is that i have to buy it myself and EAT by myself.... whahaa.... till poly year one... where i had my first really happy birthday... then year 2 and 3 i have Jie to start celebrating for me .hahaa... the usual gathering at Ju Ju hotpot. Till army...20th in OCS quietly if i am not wrong... 21st all alone in the field... 22nd ... hmmm.. I cried on that day.... Hahaha... had a very bad start in my forex trade.
Back from the side track... these are all my memories since young...
My mind then was just to live well, never had i thought of Work yet.. it wasn't until secondary school, where I had influences from my parents about stocks... It was very easy for me to take it up as it seems logically understandable. AS long as i am able to work out in logic, i would be able to understand it... Another moment that i had plan was about how to earn big amount of money... I had came up with a few which i wrote down somewhere... It all seems to me that I had it in me... till army.... I begin to think of what i want to do, what i should do. and what are the choices that i had when doing such a thing. I had a destination.. but the route was still in the process of being plan. Not until when I was out of the army.. when i pick up the book "Rich dad, Poor dad" that i begin to understand that my route was there, but there were actually more routes that i can take to get there... many things that were thought in there had gotten me to strengthen my own commitment. It had even grew my mind. I see myself growing in leaps and bounds in terms of my mind. I began to read more books, Clearing 20 books in 4+ months . A feat as i had never even hit 3 books a year prior to that. Financial Freedom is what i had aimed for. Just that i didn't know of such a term . I will become a millionaire.
I declare to the world, that I, Vernon Tay , would earn to be in the HighNetWorthIndividual List. and would want to conquer the UHNWI List. USD30 million is the benchmark.
I have the means to get there, I will get there...
This doesn't seem to suit the previous post. so, i made a new thread.
My oldest memories that I ever have... was the one where I follow my father to see my sister's birth. It was in a hospital... I don't know which hospital, but I don't bother to check it also.
It was a quiet place and life was just ....Going pass so fast....
There was another one.. which comes first i don't know.... I was in a night market in amk with my mother. She was holding on to me... but I told her to let me down.. I was too fat for her to carry... and somewhere somehow... I got a dragonball imprint T-shirt at one of the stalls...
That was when i was 4, i assume. Other memories seems faded... A kiss with my cousin. My sister's big fall from the public seat , playing with my toys in the living room . competition and being jealous that i was the one who got first, but my teammates got 1st but i got 3rd... Hahah.. stupid story.. So embarrass, going to McDonald's for my friends party, mom bring me home for lion dance. going for art class. playing "soccer" with my cousin. role playing sukasuka ranger.
friend being hit on the head of the cabinet. Being in charge of the small library. reading Enid Blyton books , seeing my friends read Malorie towers, naughtiest girl series, The tree that grew... watch toy story 1 at the movie theatre. Crying at my birthday.... Shit man... I realise that my birthday is not a good day for me... every year at my birthday , I mange to cry or feel sad...
the first birthday i remember, crying cause i got bullied , Second one, I got hit by someone i don't know. 3rd, I thought that people celebrated for my cousin but not me ( we always hold birthday together cause we are born 1 day apart, different year though)( in the end, it was always on my birthday, not my cousin ) 4th , was P6, where i got my mom to treat a lot of people in my class at McDonald's. I was crying at 12 midnight to get it.. ( It was the PSLE science paper ) . then in secondary school, i remember only the one where my mom gave me money to eat McDonald's. But the catch is that i have to buy it myself and EAT by myself.... whahaa.... till poly year one... where i had my first really happy birthday... then year 2 and 3 i have Jie to start celebrating for me .hahaa... the usual gathering at Ju Ju hotpot. Till army...20th in OCS quietly if i am not wrong... 21st all alone in the field... 22nd ... hmmm.. I cried on that day.... Hahaha... had a very bad start in my forex trade.
Back from the side track... these are all my memories since young...
My mind then was just to live well, never had i thought of Work yet.. it wasn't until secondary school, where I had influences from my parents about stocks... It was very easy for me to take it up as it seems logically understandable. AS long as i am able to work out in logic, i would be able to understand it... Another moment that i had plan was about how to earn big amount of money... I had came up with a few which i wrote down somewhere... It all seems to me that I had it in me... till army.... I begin to think of what i want to do, what i should do. and what are the choices that i had when doing such a thing. I had a destination.. but the route was still in the process of being plan. Not until when I was out of the army.. when i pick up the book "Rich dad, Poor dad" that i begin to understand that my route was there, but there were actually more routes that i can take to get there... many things that were thought in there had gotten me to strengthen my own commitment. It had even grew my mind. I see myself growing in leaps and bounds in terms of my mind. I began to read more books, Clearing 20 books in 4+ months . A feat as i had never even hit 3 books a year prior to that. Financial Freedom is what i had aimed for. Just that i didn't know of such a term . I will become a millionaire.
I declare to the world, that I, Vernon Tay , would earn to be in the HighNetWorthIndividual List. and would want to conquer the UHNWI List. USD30 million is the benchmark.
I have the means to get there, I will get there...
Feelings
2 days ago... I felt like a failure.. .
But when i look back, I must be able to stand up . Change my mindset.
Alot had went through my mind.
Risk taking... Its just whether i want to win, or i set myself down as a failure.
I had given up, and thus the last failure was me that day...
Giving up is a very dangerous thing. I need to understand this fact .
Failures are only failures when they give up.
I have not fail yet.
I will persevere and continue to try.
I play to win.
Lots of time when i look back.. I regretted many things that i did.
But what ever I had regretted, I don't regret them .
Regret does not bring me anywhere.. even if it does, it won't be anywhere good.
So, i would always want to forget what i had done and just get over with them .
No use living in past dreams.
The power of today. The power of now.
Yesterday was gone, there is nothing we can do to change it .
Tomorrow will never come. there will always be another tomorrow
But we have the power to change today's tomorrow and all the tommorrows that comes after that. We do it by changing today.
Now is the time that we have to do something . when we want to do something. Just do it. . for tomorrow never comes.
But when i look back, I must be able to stand up . Change my mindset.
Alot had went through my mind.
Risk taking... Its just whether i want to win, or i set myself down as a failure.
I had given up, and thus the last failure was me that day...
Giving up is a very dangerous thing. I need to understand this fact .
Failures are only failures when they give up.
I have not fail yet.
I will persevere and continue to try.
I play to win.
Lots of time when i look back.. I regretted many things that i did.
But what ever I had regretted, I don't regret them .
Regret does not bring me anywhere.. even if it does, it won't be anywhere good.
So, i would always want to forget what i had done and just get over with them .
No use living in past dreams.
The power of today. The power of now.
Yesterday was gone, there is nothing we can do to change it .
Tomorrow will never come. there will always be another tomorrow
But we have the power to change today's tomorrow and all the tommorrows that comes after that. We do it by changing today.
Now is the time that we have to do something . when we want to do something. Just do it. . for tomorrow never comes.
Saturday, October 18, 2008
BZ BZ
Chingay Busy.
Work Busy
Weird Weird Stuff Busy
Read Books Busy
Preparation Busy
So Busy.
Spare time to build assets one day soon.
How.. no time for my friends like ...
Like that i'll become zai nan already..
Stay at home all day. go out don't want to spend money.
i became thrifty, not because i want to , but because i do not have enough money to last me for 4 more months.
I'll be out of cash soon.. oh. no.....
No, i am not going to find a job. Sorry guys. Those who knows me, will know why.
And no, i am not going to study yet. Not yet.. Not so fast. Just wish me luck ...
And so sorry, I really have no cash to lend you, "friend". Why only come to me when you need money? I can only help you spiritually and mentally. Run errands also can.. but money? very sensitive question. I don't know you that well, and I cannot lend you money just based on your so called " assure me". Too many doubts forming. Sorry "Friend" .
By the way, why everyone that comes to me to borrow money always ask for $300 , Do i look like I can only lend $300 or is there other reason to why $300? My mom told me that the reason is that $300 is not a large sum if you really think of it, so even if they forfeit the amount , I wouldn't bark on them for long also. Its a psychologically safe amount to ask for. I agree to it. If anyone wants to borrow 300 from me, i'll reject them. Cause anyone who ask this amount = don't intend to return.
ROI for this = 0 to -infinite%
Net Capital = -300
Cash Flow = 0
Recommendation = Sorry I cannot lend you even if i have enough money to .
Good nite world. Good night to you
Work Busy
Weird Weird Stuff Busy
Read Books Busy
Preparation Busy
So Busy.
Spare time to build assets one day soon.
How.. no time for my friends like ...
Like that i'll become zai nan already..
Stay at home all day. go out don't want to spend money.
i became thrifty, not because i want to , but because i do not have enough money to last me for 4 more months.
I'll be out of cash soon.. oh. no.....
No, i am not going to find a job. Sorry guys. Those who knows me, will know why.
And no, i am not going to study yet. Not yet.. Not so fast. Just wish me luck ...
And so sorry, I really have no cash to lend you, "friend". Why only come to me when you need money? I can only help you spiritually and mentally. Run errands also can.. but money? very sensitive question. I don't know you that well, and I cannot lend you money just based on your so called " assure me". Too many doubts forming. Sorry "Friend" .
By the way, why everyone that comes to me to borrow money always ask for $300 , Do i look like I can only lend $300 or is there other reason to why $300? My mom told me that the reason is that $300 is not a large sum if you really think of it, so even if they forfeit the amount , I wouldn't bark on them for long also. Its a psychologically safe amount to ask for. I agree to it. If anyone wants to borrow 300 from me, i'll reject them. Cause anyone who ask this amount = don't intend to return.
ROI for this = 0 to -infinite%
Net Capital = -300
Cash Flow = 0
Recommendation = Sorry I cannot lend you even if i have enough money to .
Good nite world. Good night to you
Monday, October 06, 2008
2 more days...
looking back... have i done enough? or efficiently?
not very sure... but 2 more days it'll be the start of my contract for myself...
a struggle for 3 years..... I must be able to fulfil my contract and do my best!
That's my ultimate goal.
People may start calling me siao, or worth nothing...
I don't care...
I am not going to find a Job..
But I'll be working for myself.
I believe that we are what we always do . and excellence is a habit and not an act.
also... often great minds will face strong opposition from mediocre minds.
Write off.. I'll reach my goal.
not very sure... but 2 more days it'll be the start of my contract for myself...
a struggle for 3 years..... I must be able to fulfil my contract and do my best!
That's my ultimate goal.
People may start calling me siao, or worth nothing...
I don't care...
I am not going to find a Job..
But I'll be working for myself.
I believe that we are what we always do . and excellence is a habit and not an act.
also... often great minds will face strong opposition from mediocre minds.
Write off.. I'll reach my goal.
Wednesday, October 01, 2008
Habit.
Had a chat with my cous today. Very happy too, gave me lots of insights to many things. and it had also boosted my morale in what i am doing. would love to chat with him again.
May all of us succeed in our goals. Financial Freedom.
Aristote : We are what we repeatedly do , excellence therefore is not an act but a habit.
May all of us succeed in our goals. Financial Freedom.
Aristote : We are what we repeatedly do , excellence therefore is not an act but a habit.
Saturday, August 02, 2008
Take a step back to leap further...
Feeling down...
It seems that i've failed this time round... but i am sure i will be able to do the the next time.
Time is important. And i need to constantly win. I cannot let a few losses deal mental blows to me... The US market is irradical and i was not well prepared enough. My skills level below the anticipated. I need to Look at myself and see what I am missing. How good am I with certain Things. I aim to learn the ins and outs of the US markets by next month. Research, Learn, Research... understand...
TA, how they really function. At least 70% of the Tools that is supposed to be used. FA, what are the meaning of certain figures and how are they used to judge. Volatility... how to read and understand .. and how to use it. Insider trading... how much would they affect.
The industries. How each affect each other. Economic news. how to read them. Options trending.
I enjoy what i am doing... but excellence is what i aim for while enjoying... Patience Wins Battles..
I'll take a step back... the relearn everything again.... so that i can leap further... better.
It seems that i've failed this time round... but i am sure i will be able to do the the next time.
Time is important. And i need to constantly win. I cannot let a few losses deal mental blows to me... The US market is irradical and i was not well prepared enough. My skills level below the anticipated. I need to Look at myself and see what I am missing. How good am I with certain Things. I aim to learn the ins and outs of the US markets by next month. Research, Learn, Research... understand...
TA, how they really function. At least 70% of the Tools that is supposed to be used. FA, what are the meaning of certain figures and how are they used to judge. Volatility... how to read and understand .. and how to use it. Insider trading... how much would they affect.
The industries. How each affect each other. Economic news. how to read them. Options trending.
I enjoy what i am doing... but excellence is what i aim for while enjoying... Patience Wins Battles..
I'll take a step back... the relearn everything again.... so that i can leap further... better.
Monday, July 28, 2008
Monday, July 21, 2008
YMD/YWD Formation day
I am a stage crew.
felt that its not easy... or maybe i should say, its tiring. i see the stage manager managing the show, quite professional. many minor details were not missed out as we had went through in thought and in sequence. we also went through a few rehearsals. quite interesting due to the fact that even till the last minute, many things were still being changed. It takes alot to be a good host. one that doesn't need a script but still bring out the gist of the what the show is trying to say. The host also need a good response rate and quick thinking. If not there would be many many sticky situations to deal with.
We had a celebrity as host. It was quite interesting and learning experience to see him host and respond to the many many changes that occur behind the scene. Last minute insertion , Overrun in time. change of schedule, performer's stage fright, missing items, wrong camera focusing. lighting problem, sound problem, mic problem, all sorts of problem.
Nice day today!
felt that its not easy... or maybe i should say, its tiring. i see the stage manager managing the show, quite professional. many minor details were not missed out as we had went through in thought and in sequence. we also went through a few rehearsals. quite interesting due to the fact that even till the last minute, many things were still being changed. It takes alot to be a good host. one that doesn't need a script but still bring out the gist of the what the show is trying to say. The host also need a good response rate and quick thinking. If not there would be many many sticky situations to deal with.
We had a celebrity as host. It was quite interesting and learning experience to see him host and respond to the many many changes that occur behind the scene. Last minute insertion , Overrun in time. change of schedule, performer's stage fright, missing items, wrong camera focusing. lighting problem, sound problem, mic problem, all sorts of problem.
Nice day today!
Monday, July 14, 2008
Tuesday, July 08, 2008
Wednesday, July 02, 2008
Give me 30 Days....
Woah... I am still not working....
30 more days... just 30... why?? cause i need to confirm something...
on what is it that i need to do...
that what is it that i need to find in myself..
Am embarking on something that is not easy.
But i just have this feeling that I might be able to make it...
If i did.... I'll be so damn happy...
Really very happy.. Secret... i hope i won't fail this..
cause my family is looking at me on this...
I know i can do it... needs alot of studies... and attention too.. until i get used to it...
Sleeping late every night... tiring sia...
But the one staying up late with me is my father...
I admired this fact that he is working so hard and still stay up late with me...
I need to learn...
My mom wants me to make it big the first shot.. But how big is big?
Attention on this everyday? I am sure i'll become "Zai nan" soon if this carries on. hahaha
But i see this as not just work.. but a personal goal to make it big.
Well, also to proove my relatives wrong..
Just have to be carefull... and extra careful..
Today is Kailing jie's birthday! HAPPY Birthday!!! hee...
30 more days... just 30... why?? cause i need to confirm something...
on what is it that i need to do...
that what is it that i need to find in myself..
Am embarking on something that is not easy.
But i just have this feeling that I might be able to make it...
If i did.... I'll be so damn happy...
Really very happy.. Secret... i hope i won't fail this..
cause my family is looking at me on this...
I know i can do it... needs alot of studies... and attention too.. until i get used to it...
Sleeping late every night... tiring sia...
But the one staying up late with me is my father...
I admired this fact that he is working so hard and still stay up late with me...
I need to learn...
My mom wants me to make it big the first shot.. But how big is big?
Attention on this everyday? I am sure i'll become "Zai nan" soon if this carries on. hahaha
But i see this as not just work.. but a personal goal to make it big.
Well, also to proove my relatives wrong..
Just have to be carefull... and extra careful..
Today is Kailing jie's birthday! HAPPY Birthday!!! hee...
Monday, June 23, 2008
Thursday, June 19, 2008
Whats in my mind... Whats on my mind...
Sometimes things run wild in my mind...
sometimes....
I do not understand how i feel.
There is this intuition in me that is screaming out loud, telling me that there is something wrong about you, and that you are hiding yourself from me.
You have something that you do not want me to know. something that makes me wonder if you are really ... really... you...
I can feel it, leaking out from time to time from you.
I did not want to believe it. but i can't help but think ...
and i don't really like what i see... you might not be the one...
Things run wild in my mind.
Sometimes...
Triple personality...
thats me...
So, which side of me should i put on?
I forgot how to remove my different mask from my face.
living in a facade...
whats my inner self?
sometimes....
I do not understand how i feel.
There is this intuition in me that is screaming out loud, telling me that there is something wrong about you, and that you are hiding yourself from me.
You have something that you do not want me to know. something that makes me wonder if you are really ... really... you...
I can feel it, leaking out from time to time from you.
I did not want to believe it. but i can't help but think ...
and i don't really like what i see... you might not be the one...
Things run wild in my mind.
Sometimes...
Triple personality...
thats me...
So, which side of me should i put on?
I forgot how to remove my different mask from my face.
living in a facade...
whats my inner self?
Wednesday, June 18, 2008
Very Random Thoughts from me
First i dunno if this would be a very long post or very short post. but i am sure there would be alot of typo here and there...
Alot alot of thoughts in my mind.
couldn't number them, can't count as they are all not concrete...
Was hanging out with my friends today... Many thoughts.
the 7 closest people / 7 's class and status would be the one that you are residing in.
So.. Who are my Real 7? I dun really know... up till now. i can only see 3 to 4 that is really close to me. So work hard buddies. hahaha...
Youth is coming to an end for me. I am starting to feel like an adult. although physically i am one. mentally, i am not really prepared yet. but i hope i am taking i well. experience comes in many forms. maturity comes with experience . I begin to do things that i have not done in my youth. want to live and leave it with no regrets so that there is something that won't pull me back.
To CLUB
Went clubbing ,
Liquor , NO SMOKE, NO OneNightStand.
Dance. lights, Music. DJs.
RELATIONSHIPS
Enjoyed the emotions of relationships, the ups and down. high integrity, not doing anything that is against my morals. knowing that love do exist in this world. Made choices that i had regreted, made choices that also given me understanding. But i would say all the relationships that i had, No regrets from them. I dun really like breakups.... but i guess it is part of this "enjoyment"
FRIENDS
Feeling that friends do exist in the world.
Learning from everyone that are willing to teach.
Knowing that not all friends are friends, that there are actually people who just treat you like a stepping stone. to bully you when they have the chance..
To know that not everyone you know is at the same level as you.
Knowing that there are friends who would stand up for you. To have someone to look up to, to compete with for improvement. to grow together.
To know that everyone is going through the same shit as you.
Friends don't really exist in the working world. but i know... that friends that i have made in my youths, would always be friends with me.
PERSONAL CHARACTER
From experiences I've realise that being too good a person don't always work.
People tend to make use of you. neglect your feelings. Lets see.... about flaws
I hope people can enlighten me on my flaws that i do not know.
I've always asked people around me... but for some reasons, they always try to avoid the question. if not they would just give me generic answers. here's what i know about myself...
I am a friend of the world... This had cause me problems. esp when it deals with people relations. People start fighting and it come a point that i have to take sides. decisions that i absolutely hate to make.
Boasting* Well.. i know this flaw.... i tend to exaggerate. I know i know.
Being defensive when even though i know i am wrong. I always need to find a way where everyone comes to a favourable conclusion. Maybe its Ego... but i don't really like to lose.
indecisiveness on stuffs. There is always the time where people wants me to make decision. same thing, i need to find a way where everyone is happy. so, i normally tend to want to listen to other people's ideas. Looking for options i guess. but it is a flaw that i would need to change. Hahha.. thats why i normally stick with people who makes decisions or plan before hand so that there is at least something to do somewhere. And that is also why i normally fail in dates. hahaha.. i make last minute decisions which makes people not happy. Soon, i will start to not care about other people's feelings and just do what ever that suits me. I think that life is not always about other people.My time for myself is coming soon... To start being decisive... i'll be changing my character slowing but fast enough to feel...
Laziness when there is nothing to do.
To want to do things to my best, even when the requirement is the bare min. I dun really like it when i am asked to do something halfheartedly or ask to do so that i fail things. I prefer just NOT to do it.
Responsibility. I tend to shirk responsibility if i can, but i seem to always get the attention of the people who would then choose me to do stuffs... Well, i dun really mind.... cause with great responsibility also comes great power... or the other way around....
Passion like Fire... maybe this is my biggest flaw....
So, whats my other flaws?
I told sam and yiying that i have 2 things left to do before I stop being a youth and venture into the adulthood. This 2 things have to be settled before i can concentrate on being an adult and work... What are the 2 things, i shall not say as they will remain in my heart until i've done it. .No, its not sex, nor smoking...
I need to rest.... a 5 days of pure nothing, with no one to bother me... with nothing that can distract me. No computer, no phone, no access with friends... time for myself. and just myself... but my parents are not really giving me this time. i've been nagged at everyday. unnecessary stress given by my parents... well, lots of secrets that i cannot say...but if any one of the secrets leaked, i am dead and the stress will kill.. Nope, i cannot tell anyone... but this "extra" stress is not very good for me....
Well.... Looking for Cycling Kakis - Night cycling.... 1 night round Singapore if possible. going to places and taking photos.
Looking for DSLR cameras to play with and to take all the shots that i had wanted to take... ( not to acquire the camera yet though. )
People, dun buy me shoes even though i've been saying that i am lacking it..... I am superstitious i'll have to buy it myself.. Help me take a lookout for nice shoes. not sports shoes k.
lazy to cont... now is late in the night.. need to sleep.
shall continue someother day.
Alot alot of thoughts in my mind.
couldn't number them, can't count as they are all not concrete...
Was hanging out with my friends today... Many thoughts.
the 7 closest people / 7 's class and status would be the one that you are residing in.
So.. Who are my Real 7? I dun really know... up till now. i can only see 3 to 4 that is really close to me. So work hard buddies. hahaha...
Youth is coming to an end for me. I am starting to feel like an adult. although physically i am one. mentally, i am not really prepared yet. but i hope i am taking i well. experience comes in many forms. maturity comes with experience . I begin to do things that i have not done in my youth. want to live and leave it with no regrets so that there is something that won't pull me back.
To CLUB
Went clubbing ,
Liquor , NO SMOKE, NO OneNightStand.
Dance. lights, Music. DJs.
RELATIONSHIPS
Enjoyed the emotions of relationships, the ups and down. high integrity, not doing anything that is against my morals. knowing that love do exist in this world. Made choices that i had regreted, made choices that also given me understanding. But i would say all the relationships that i had, No regrets from them. I dun really like breakups.... but i guess it is part of this "enjoyment"
FRIENDS
Feeling that friends do exist in the world.
Learning from everyone that are willing to teach.
Knowing that not all friends are friends, that there are actually people who just treat you like a stepping stone. to bully you when they have the chance..
To know that not everyone you know is at the same level as you.
Knowing that there are friends who would stand up for you. To have someone to look up to, to compete with for improvement. to grow together.
To know that everyone is going through the same shit as you.
Friends don't really exist in the working world. but i know... that friends that i have made in my youths, would always be friends with me.
PERSONAL CHARACTER
From experiences I've realise that being too good a person don't always work.
People tend to make use of you. neglect your feelings. Lets see.... about flaws
I hope people can enlighten me on my flaws that i do not know.
I've always asked people around me... but for some reasons, they always try to avoid the question. if not they would just give me generic answers. here's what i know about myself...
I am a friend of the world... This had cause me problems. esp when it deals with people relations. People start fighting and it come a point that i have to take sides. decisions that i absolutely hate to make.
Boasting* Well.. i know this flaw.... i tend to exaggerate. I know i know.
Being defensive when even though i know i am wrong. I always need to find a way where everyone comes to a favourable conclusion. Maybe its Ego... but i don't really like to lose.
indecisiveness on stuffs. There is always the time where people wants me to make decision. same thing, i need to find a way where everyone is happy. so, i normally tend to want to listen to other people's ideas. Looking for options i guess. but it is a flaw that i would need to change. Hahha.. thats why i normally stick with people who makes decisions or plan before hand so that there is at least something to do somewhere. And that is also why i normally fail in dates. hahaha.. i make last minute decisions which makes people not happy. Soon, i will start to not care about other people's feelings and just do what ever that suits me. I think that life is not always about other people.My time for myself is coming soon... To start being decisive... i'll be changing my character slowing but fast enough to feel...
Laziness when there is nothing to do.
To want to do things to my best, even when the requirement is the bare min. I dun really like it when i am asked to do something halfheartedly or ask to do so that i fail things. I prefer just NOT to do it.
Responsibility. I tend to shirk responsibility if i can, but i seem to always get the attention of the people who would then choose me to do stuffs... Well, i dun really mind.... cause with great responsibility also comes great power... or the other way around....
Passion like Fire... maybe this is my biggest flaw....
So, whats my other flaws?
I told sam and yiying that i have 2 things left to do before I stop being a youth and venture into the adulthood. This 2 things have to be settled before i can concentrate on being an adult and work... What are the 2 things, i shall not say as they will remain in my heart until i've done it. .No, its not sex, nor smoking...
I need to rest.... a 5 days of pure nothing, with no one to bother me... with nothing that can distract me. No computer, no phone, no access with friends... time for myself. and just myself... but my parents are not really giving me this time. i've been nagged at everyday. unnecessary stress given by my parents... well, lots of secrets that i cannot say...but if any one of the secrets leaked, i am dead and the stress will kill.. Nope, i cannot tell anyone... but this "extra" stress is not very good for me....
Well.... Looking for Cycling Kakis - Night cycling.... 1 night round Singapore if possible. going to places and taking photos.
Looking for DSLR cameras to play with and to take all the shots that i had wanted to take... ( not to acquire the camera yet though. )
People, dun buy me shoes even though i've been saying that i am lacking it..... I am superstitious i'll have to buy it myself.. Help me take a lookout for nice shoes. not sports shoes k.
lazy to cont... now is late in the night.. need to sleep.
shall continue someother day.
Friday, June 13, 2008
Went out with Cat and Gavin.
Long time since the last i saw cat.
Prettier liao.
Plans for life...
I really have to start very soon.
Losing money quickly...
once it hit my cushion amount....
I'll have to start to find work...
But before that...
my list of things I want to Improve in for this 3-6 months
Flash action script,
HTML Scripts
Jap.
Strength
stock judgment
Java
Long time since the last i saw cat.
Prettier liao.
Plans for life...
I really have to start very soon.
Losing money quickly...
once it hit my cushion amount....
I'll have to start to find work...
But before that...
my list of things I want to Improve in for this 3-6 months
Flash action script,
HTML Scripts
Jap.
Strength
stock judgment
Java
Tuesday, June 10, 2008
Friday, June 06, 2008
6 Letters, 5 Exclaimation mark ,4 spaces ,3 Parts,2 Tabs & 1 Final Message...
It has come to the point...
16 more hours...
and i'll not look back after that.
It has been a long and tedious journey.
I've enjoyed it.
all the pain, joy, laughter. sadness. ALL running through my mind.
All the momories... Ever since i've stepped into this phase of my life... NS.
BMT- Mohawk Coy Platoon 4 Secion 2 Bed 11
Unforgettable buddies. Best section of the company, enough said.
OCS - Tango Wing Platoon 1 Section 3 Bed 4 First/ Bed 3 Second
Ranger Days, Hardship and Pain, Always a Pizza Hut away. hahaha.. Anton hse to drink Ribena.
OCS - Signal Wing Platoon 1 Cadet mess Bunk
Tao Pork Days. Study and study, but still can fail comms test. ROC was Fun
OCS - Signal Wing Platoon 1 Bunk with Daniel
I just need a little of your time to show you that i am the one. Maroon 5! our Swords and Marching! Signal!
Commissioned as CSE CMDR in ANSTS
1 Year of memories with everyone in the section. CPTs, LTA, 2LT, MWO 1SG , 3 SG, PTE
Time passes super fast there. Busy until CMI, learnt alot there too. second half was super slack. going through Civillian Conversion Course now.
Matured quite abit. now being more serious, I hope...
this young little boy had learnt about life.
Enough Said... I'll end off with this
O R D L O H !!!!!
16 more hours...
and i'll not look back after that.
It has been a long and tedious journey.
I've enjoyed it.
all the pain, joy, laughter. sadness. ALL running through my mind.
All the momories... Ever since i've stepped into this phase of my life... NS.
BMT- Mohawk Coy Platoon 4 Secion 2 Bed 11
Unforgettable buddies. Best section of the company, enough said.
OCS - Tango Wing Platoon 1 Section 3 Bed 4 First/ Bed 3 Second
Ranger Days, Hardship and Pain, Always a Pizza Hut away. hahaha.. Anton hse to drink Ribena.
OCS - Signal Wing Platoon 1 Cadet mess Bunk
Tao Pork Days. Study and study, but still can fail comms test. ROC was Fun
OCS - Signal Wing Platoon 1 Bunk with Daniel
I just need a little of your time to show you that i am the one. Maroon 5! our Swords and Marching! Signal!
Commissioned as CSE CMDR in ANSTS
1 Year of memories with everyone in the section. CPTs, LTA, 2LT, MWO 1SG , 3 SG, PTE
Time passes super fast there. Busy until CMI, learnt alot there too. second half was super slack. going through Civillian Conversion Course now.
Matured quite abit. now being more serious, I hope...
this young little boy had learnt about life.
Enough Said... I'll end off with this
O R D L O H !!!!!
Wednesday, June 04, 2008
Saturday, May 31, 2008
Tuesday, May 27, 2008
Monday, May 26, 2008
Sunday, May 25, 2008
Thursday, May 22, 2008
5 more work days.
Officially, i have 5 more working days to ORD .
Starting 2nd June till 6th June
Guess what? its all planned out .
2nd june - Clearance ( to fin about 80%)
3rd June - NE Day, get some ORD award.
4th June - Final Hand Over
5th June - Clearance part 2 ( to fin 95% ) lunch somewhere
6 June - Sign Last clearance , destroy Issac card, return camp pass , get pink IC, Write ORD mail
and Say bye bye to all. Paste IC on forehead , walk around saying that i ORD, mail divert to understudy . follow the tradition pack everything.... SLAM the ANSTS Door!
Shout ORD Lo. Get out of camp, Go home, celebrate somewhere. and feel ORD mood.
:)
Starting 2nd June till 6th June
Guess what? its all planned out .
2nd june - Clearance ( to fin about 80%)
3rd June - NE Day, get some ORD award.
4th June - Final Hand Over
5th June - Clearance part 2 ( to fin 95% ) lunch somewhere
6 June - Sign Last clearance , destroy Issac card, return camp pass , get pink IC, Write ORD mail
and Say bye bye to all. Paste IC on forehead , walk around saying that i ORD, mail divert to understudy . follow the tradition pack everything.... SLAM the ANSTS Door!
Shout ORD Lo. Get out of camp, Go home, celebrate somewhere. and feel ORD mood.
:)
Monday, February 18, 2008
Should I even have said to come to my hse?
Should i have even said ok? why didn't i said that i was busy?
am now in a state so wrong. I... dunno what to do...
am now in a state so wrong. I... dunno what to do...
Sunday, February 10, 2008
Outing W the Secondary School guys
Miss all the sec school days....
Life is never going to be that simple anymore.
When will we enjoy this again? haiz...
Life is never going to be that simple anymore.
When will we enjoy this again? haiz...
Its sad to know that....
its gone from the world now....
no longer it will chirp.
Dun be too sad... I am sure it has led a good life with your family.
no longer it will chirp.
Dun be too sad... I am sure it has led a good life with your family.
Friday, February 08, 2008
Thursday, February 07, 2008
Happy Chinese New Year
Well. Lots of things in my mind. not all good, but not all bad also.
Happy chinese new year ...
Happy chinese new year ...
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